Where God closes a door, somewhere He opens a window

Okay. For the rest of 2009, I rule that the family drama be kept at a minimum. It seems like it's been months since we've been truly out of the woods. Since Justin got diagnosed, it seems like it's been one thing after another. I'm hoping it will be smooth sailing for the next few months. I know God presents these situations to better us and that we should praise Him in the storm. I get that part. I believe that part. I just think my family needs a little breather. We need a break. That's not too much to ask, is it? ... Look at me. Here I am complaining when there are people in this world dealing with much harder stuff. My aunt's friend just found out she has terminal cancer, just days after her mother died. My cousin and her husband are facing a setback in their adoption process. The drama my family is dealing with is nowhere near that extreme. Okay, yes, my mom's thing could have been bad if they hadn't caught it. But they did and she's fine. And Justin's health is major, but he's got it under control and he's doing really well. Our issues are things that can be fixed. We have nothing to complain about. We have a wonderful Savior who loves us and carries us through the hardships. And we have each other. That's one thing I've learned a lot about recently, my family. I have the greatest family in the world. My family members are some of my favorite people in the world. My immediate family has always been close, but lately I've gotten a lot closer to some of my cousins. Cousins I thought I had nothing in common with are suddenly people I communicate with in one way or another every day. I used to go weeks without seeing them and now I have withdrawals. You know the saying: "Where God closes a door, somewhere He opens a window"? I think that applies to my life these past few months. Yes, God has tried my family a lot, but He has brought us each other. And for that, I think it was worth it.

Here Comes the Hard Stuff

Ever heard the expression "When it rains, it pours?" I think that's a perfect way to explain all the family drama going on these days. I almost saw it coming. I've been in such a good place lately, it seemed like it was all too good to be true. Like something was bound to fall apart. Well, today has not been that great as far as my family goes. And it was my mother's birthday. We were supposed to be celebrating, but instead I find myself snapping into the role of dutiful daughter. My mom had a routine eye appointment today. She had laser surgery in both eyes a little over seven years ago to correct diabetic retinopathy. As far as diabetic complications go, hers have been very limited. The retinopathy has really been all. We thought it was all behind us. And then her doctor found bleeding in her right eye and she has to have another laser surgery this week. I'm so thankful she went to the doctor today because, otherwise, they wouldn't have seen it. Retinopathy left untreated can lead to blindness. So I can definitely see God's presence already in this situation. I just feel like she's dealt with her fair share of illness these past few weeks. First with her finger that led to surgery and a four-day hospital stay and now this. She really needs a few weeks to be healthy. Hopefully, we'll get this taken care of Thursday and she can start to heal and truly celebrate her 49th year of life. And then there's my cousin, Shanon. For the past year or so, my cousin and her husband have been going through the adoption process: saving their money in hopes that they will adopt a baby from Russia sometime in the near future. So far, everything has gone fairly smoothly. They have trusted the Lord in it all and He has guided them through. Then today they found out that the home study agency they've been using is on a list sent from Russia that they will not accept. I don't know the extent of what this means yet, but it's not a step forward. They will most likely be out the money, which they cannot afford to lose right now, and have to take a few steps back to begin the home study again. I know it's incredibly frustrating for them. It is for me, an outsider looking in. I've watched them struggle through this year and I want this so bad for them. They are going to be fantastic parents and they deserve it so badly. We all truly believe God has His hand on this and He will lead them through the hard stuff. There's a story in the Bible where Jesus is in a boat with His disciples and a bad storm comes up on them. There's a verse that says, "He carried them through to the other side." God never promised us life would be easy. We all have our hardships, no doubt. But He promised us we would never have to go it alone. He promised He would take us through to the other side, see us through the hard times. I choose to see these family issues as a test of faith, to see how much we are truly depending on the Lord. That's the definition of faith anyway, right? Forsaking all I TRUST Him. It's going to be a bumpy ride, but the Lord is with us. Enough said.  

He Keeps Me Singing

I've adopted a new outlook on life recently and people have been asking me what's up with my newfound positivity. I don't really have an answer. It's not anything I did myself. It's totally been God. I've been praying for God to be more than enough for me and, as it turns out, I'm starting to believe it. These past few days, I've been happier and more carefree than I've been in a very long time. It has to be a God thing because nothing in my life has really changed. I'm just choosing to stay positive. I'm seeing all these Facebook and Twitter updates with people complaining about their lives and how they're feeling and I just realized how much of a drag that is. I am, by no means, innocent of this. I'm one of the biggest complainers I know. Which is exactly why I'm trying to look on the bright side. Because my life could be so much worse and it's not. And truly, God is more than enough for me. So because of this new mantra on life, I've been a lot lighter and more confident than I've been in years. I just don't see the point of wasting what little time on earth I have moping and feeling sorry for myself. Life's too short not to laugh and have fun. And I can't wait to see what God has in store for me next. I know that whatever it is, He has my best interest at heart and He will lead me through.